The Onion just can't get enough of Paul Pierce ...

First they accuse him of using a spitball during a game, now they're looking at both the strong side and the weak side to his game (theonion.com):

Is Pierce the most underrated or the least overrated shooting guard in the playoffs?

STRONG SIDE:

• Special headband allows him to read opponent's minds
• Although his shooting takes advantage of the characteristics of Newtonian space-time, Pierce accomplishes this without conscious thought
• Good at giving convincing high-fives when teammates miss free throws
• Kevin Garnett
• Extremely large hands allow him to fake a pass with two fingers while shooting with the other three
• Although he is at the exact same skill level as him, he is much nicer than Evil Paul Pierce
• Huge toes allow for awesome pivots

WEAK SIDE:

• Somehow wears headband at a jaunty angle
• Laser vision is just the "pointer" kind, not the "death ray" kind
• I-didn't-foul-that-guy face not incredulous enough
• Terrified of little Celtic-guy drawing
• When donating money, seems to favor children
• Name more of a white-shoe lawyer name than a scrappy-point-guard name
• Always hangs out in the seedy "Way Downtown" part of the key